


What Does The 'A' Stand For?

by Adventures_in_Writing



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: AU, Android Washington, Docnut, M/M, Tuckington - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-15
Updated: 2015-01-26
Packaged: 2018-02-21 06:56:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2458976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adventures_in_Writing/pseuds/Adventures_in_Writing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tucker couldn’t wait to see what his android looked like! He had made sure to check all the right boxes: blonde and attractive. That’s all that really mattered.</p>
<p>What would she look like? Oh man, Tucker hoped she was smokin’. Not that he’d want to do anything inappropriate with her. Okay. Maybe he kinda did, but he mostly just wanted someone pretty to look at.</p>
<p>Carefully, Tucker brushed away the foam peanuts from the robot’s face and did a double take.</p>
<p>Oh, fuckberries.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Initial prompt from over on my Tumblr: unit washington is an android, and tucker is his owner after accidentally ordering him as his personal unit instead of the "attractive female assistant" unit he meant to buy (no refunds~) 
> 
> Eventual Tuckington~ But I'm aiming for a queerplatonic relationship with aromantic asexual Wash. We'll see how it goes. :)

Tucker had been trying for months to find someone who could babysit his son, Junior, while he was at work. Sending him to a childcare or preschool was out of the question. Junior didn’t speak, so his options were limited and _expensive_. Those places were way too expensive for a single parent on a single income. Unfortunately, with the increase of androids, there were less jobs that people were willing to do.  
  
Apparently babysitting was one of them.  
  
Tucker was running out of options. He couldn’t keep asking his friends to look after Junior four days a week. He’d researched his options and it was starting to seem like a far better idea to just purchase an android rather than try to hire someone. The downpayment was pricey, but he could afford it if he didn’t spend his money stupidly for the next couple of months. After that, the monthly repayments weren’t too unreasonable. Again, things would be a little tight, but he’d manage. It would at least be cheaper than sending Junior to a special daycare and he’d get an android out of it too.  
  
Tucker had taken the day off of work, and had asked Donut to look after Junior until his parcel arrived. He had just sat down with a cup of coffee in hand when the door bell rang. Tucker couldn’t help the little surge of excitement that tickled him. He couldn’t wait to see what his android looked like! He had made sure to check all the right boxes: blonde and attractive. That’s all that really mattered.  
  
He signed for the package and allowed the two delivery men to enter the house. Goddamn, the box was huge. How tall was this chick?!  
The delivery man ran through a couple of key points in the terms and conditions: No refunds for incorrect choices, lifetime warranty on internal hardware, software upgrades were the responsibility of the owner and/or unit and some other apparently important stuff that Tucker wasn’t paying attention to.  
He signed the line that the delivery guy had marked with an ‘X’ and sent them on their way. As soon as he closed the front door, he ran over to the box and hurriedly pulled the tape off.  
  
It felt like Christmas had come early.  
  
What would she look like? Oh man, Tucker hoped she was _smokin’_. Not that he’d want to do anything inappropriate with her. Okay. Maybe he kinda did, but he mostly just wanted someone pretty to look at. She seemed pretty damn tall (well, taller than Tucker at least) which isn’t what he’d typically look for in an attractive girl, but hey, he didn’t judge. It would just take some getting used to. The box was filled with those annoying foam peanut things, and before he knew it, there were foam things all over the living room floor as he tried to unbury his android. Carefully, Tucker brushed away the foam peanuts from the robot’s face and did a double take.  
  
Oh, fuckberries.  
  
Scooping out more of the foam peanuts confirmed Tucker’s fears.  
  
Its hair was cropped short; dusky brownish grey roots with blonde tips.  
  
But short hair wasn’t the only thing ‘wrong’ with his purchase.   
  
The android’s face was angular. It had a strong jawline and a straight nose, its lips were slightly parted and not quite as full as Tucker would have wanted. Countless freckles decorated its pale skin and even though its body was still covered in foam peanuts, Tucker knew.  
  
He’d ordered the _male_ option.

  
  
Fuck.

  
  
Right away he picked up his phone. He’d call the company and explain he’d made an honest mistake and then they’d take it—him—back and then Tucker could trade it—him— in for the hot chick model.  
  
He looked over at the ‘sleeping’ android and paused as he remembered signing the dotted line.

  
  
Fuck.

  
  
Sighing to himself Tucker awkwardly tried to sit the android up. Holy shit, that thing weighed a tonne! Supporting him so he wouldn’t topple over, Tucker flicked the tiny switch at the base of the android’s neck just beneath the two data ports.  
  
The android’s hand twitched and Tucker shuffled back a little, away from the box. He didn’t want to crowd the guy. He waited for the android to boot up and wondered if he should let Junior help name the robot.  
  
Greenish-hazel eyes met grey-blue ones.  
  
“Hello, my name is David.”  
  
Oh shit, the android had one hell of a voice. Tucker wanted him to keep talking. He could keep talking all day.  
  
“Uh…I’m Tucker.”  
  
The android—David—seemed confused. “My basic data on you states that your name is Lavernius.”  
  
“I don’t really go by that name. People call me by my last name.”  
  
“I see. Should I also go by my last name?” David definitely seemed confused.  
  
“If you want to. Do androids even have last names?” Tucker wondered.  
  
“Mine is Washington. Similar to the state.”  
  
“Washington. Wash. Hmmm…I think I like that better. Do you like it, Wash?”  
  
David thought it over for a moment or two. Tucker thought it strange that an android needed to think, but they were getting smarter and smarter these days. Who knew. Maybe they were more human than people gave them credit for.  
  
“Yes, I think so.” Wash peered around the room. “Where is Junior? My basic data says that you have a son and that he does not speak. You were a little vague on the details on the questionnaire that you needed to fill out upon purchase, so I apologise if there is some information missing.”  
  
Tucker had forgotten that androids were a lot like children when they were first booted up. His friend, Caboose’s android was so different now than what he was back when he was first purchased it was easy to forget. Sometimes you’d even forget that Church wasn’t a person. Things would be slow with Wash for a little while, but they’d get there in the end.  
  
“Junior is being looked after by a friend of mine at the moment. I thought that maybe we’d get to know each other a bit first before he gets home. You’ve got learning software, right? You’ll pick up what you need to know. If not, you can just ask. Now how about you climb out of that box and we find you some clothes.” Tucker paused. “You did come with at least one pair of clothes, right?”  
  
“Clothing is classified as an optional extra.”  
  
“…Aww, shit. _Please_ tell me you have pants.” Tucker sounded desperate.  
  
“By default we come with one outfit.” Wash stood and, contrary to what everyone would believe of Tucker, he turned away. “Note: nakedness embarrasses my owner.”  
  
“What? No way does nakedness embarrass me! I just thought you might have wanted some privacy or something. Now shut up, put your damn clothes on and we’ll go shopping.” Tucker looked Wash over, “I definitely don’t have anything that’s gonna fit you.”  
  
Wash was quiet for a moment. “Is that envy I detect?”  
  
Tucker laughed and gave Wash a grin. “Oh hell no it isn’t, Wash. One day you might find out why.”


	2. Babysitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What happened?" Donut asked, making his way over to the kitchen sink.
> 
> "An unsupervised Junior is what happened," Doc said with a smile as he nodded towards the fridge and pantry.
> 
> "What…? I checked on him when he was playing Lego like fifteen minutes ago."
> 
> Doc chuckled. “Fifteen minutes is a long time for a restless little rascal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Featuring Docnut! 
> 
> I’ve intentionally left off punctuation from sentences that are signed in a feeble attempt to make it obvious that those sentences aren’t spoken.

* * *

Tucker had dropped Junior off early that morning while he waited for a package to arrive. Although Donut did have a physiotherapy client this morning, he decided to help Tucker out. Donut didn’t blame him for wanting to leave Junior with him and Doc for the day. New androids were sometimes a little slow when they were first booted up. It would be better to not have an inquisitive and boisterous child firing a million questions at the poor thing. At least, not until it had gathered its bearings and had some basic interaction with people.  
  
Junior had been coming to Donut’s house for visits since he was old enough to start talking. He had an issue with speech and for a few years, Tucker had thought that perhaps some speech therapy sessions with Doc would help. It became apparent that the speech therapy lessons weren’t doing all that much, so Doc had decided that they shouldn’t continue. Why waste money on something that wasn’t working? Besides, being mute wasn’t much of a problem to begin with; there were other communication methods aside from speech for him to use. If Junior didn’t want to talk, they shouldn’t force him.  
  
Junior carried around a little whiteboard and marker when he was visiting Donut’s house. Although Donut could sign because of an accident that resulted in a large degree of hearing loss, he wasn’t the best at understanding it when Junior was signing things a hundred miles an hour.  
  
For some reason today, Junior seemed restless. He fidgeted all throughout the DVD that Donut had put on for him and the coloured pencils held his attention for five minutes. Normally Junior could draw for at least an hour unsupervised.  
Donut had been with a client when he heard a crash from the living room. Hurriedly excusing himself, explaining that there was a child on the loose in the house, he went to see what the commotion was.  
  
There were small pieces of Lego everywhere and amidst the colorful blocks, Junior was growling and stomping around as though he were Godzilla. Although the scene was cute, Donut really needed him to be quiet until Doc came home with the shopping.  
  
"Junior, I’m with someone at the moment. Could you keep the noise down until I’m done? I won’t be long, promise."  
  
Junior looked up at Donut and nodded. He stopped his growling, but continued to demolish the Lego city. He waved his arms around, trying to be imposing as he stomped around the living room.  
Shaking his head, Donut returned to his client. How Junior could step barefooted on Lego was beyond him.  
  
Donut was just finishing up when he heard a startled cry that thankfully didn’t belong to Junior. Pointedly ignoring it for now, he scheduled his client’s appointment for next week and told them to continue with their exercises before politely seeing them out. As soon as they had returned to their car, Donut raced into the house. He knew it hadn’t been Junior that had shouted out, so he wasn’t too concerned but he wanted to know what Doc’s shout was about.  
  
He found the living room in a mess but it was unoccupied. Strange…where had Junior got to? He couldn’t hear anything being destroyed, so he must have settled down somewhere.  
  
"Doc?" Donut called out.  
  
"In the kitchen, Donut!"  
  
Junior was happily sitting at the kitchen table, his hands in a large mixing bowl squishing a large ball of brightly coloured blue dough. There were other piles of coloured dough dotted around the table. He seemed occupied enough for now, thank goodness. Doc had the broom, a bucket and a mop out and was presently filling the sink with water.  
  
"What happened?" Donut asked, making his way over to the kitchen sink.  
  
"An unsupervised Junior is what happened," Doc said with a smile as he nodded towards the fridge and pantry.  
  
Dried pasta and rice had been spilled over the floor and bags of flour had been knocked to the ground. There were six or seven eggs smashed on the tiles by the fridge and Donut thinks that half the bottle of milk is with them.  
  
"What…? I checked on him when he was playing Lego like fifteen minutes ago."  
  
Doc chuckled. “Fifteen minutes is a long time for a restless little rascal. Can you clean up the fridge for me? I want to ask Junior what’s wrong.”  
  
Donut nodded and quickly began to pick up the egg shells. If the eggs dried they would be a nightmare to clean off of the floor!  
  
Doc was a little concerned. Although Junior could be boisterous, he usually was quite a well-behaved child and respected people’s things. He wondered if perhaps there was something bothering him and if he was asking for some attention. Maybe Tucker had been working extra hours and hadn’t been able to spend as much time with his son? Doc couldn’t blame Tucker at all. It was tough being a single parent and everything Tucker did, he did for Junior.  
  
"Hey, Junior," Doc said, taking a seat at the table.  
  
Junior looked up from the playdough sheepishly. He gave Doc a small, shy wave before apologizing for the mess in the kitchen. Doc smiled warmly, signing that next time he wanted to make playdough he should wait for an adult to help.  
Picking up a piece of the playdough, Doc began to make random shapes with Junior.  
  
‘Are you feeling okay’ Doc signed.  
  
Junior shook his head and sighed. It was an over exaggeration, but Doc realised what he was trying to convey.  
  
‘Whats wrong’  
   
Junior’s brow furrowed as his lips were down turned as he signed quickly saying that he was worried that his Papa would like his new ‘toy’ better than him.  
Doc smiled and pushed his chair away from the table. He opened his arms, inviting Junior over for a hug. Junior slid out of the chair and clambered up onto Doc’s lap and he quickly wrapped Junior in a big, warm hug.  
  
"Don’t worry about that, Junior. Your Dad will always love you the most. Did you know he’s getting the android to help him spend more time with you?"  
  
Junior wriggled around, freeing his hands so he could sign.  
‘Really’  
  
Doc nodded. ‘It’ll be like getting a new big sister, or a new Mom.’  
  
Junior’s eyes widened. A new Mom? That might be nice. He couldn’t remember what his real mom was like, but he had seen mothers with other kids around and they seemed like a nice thing to have.  
  
Suddenly, Junior couldn’t wait for Tucker to come and pick him up. He sure hoped that his new Mom or sister was really nice.


	3. Not Mom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mid-way through his story about how he was playing tag with Donut before baking cakes with Doc, Junior realised that there was a new person to the group. He peered up at Wash curiously. He brought his small hand to his face and his expression grew confused. Resting his thumb just beneath his chin, crooked his finger a couple of times and then pointed at Wash for extra clarification.
> 
> “This is Wash, he’s an android that will be staying with us.” Tucker said, signing along as he spoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really hard remembering to write 'Mom' instead of 'Mum'.

* * *

Tucker tapped the steering wheel nervously as he pulled into the driveway of Donut’s place. He’d been here many, many times over the years; either for game nights with his friends or for Junior’s therapy sessions with Doc.  
  
"Why are you impatient?" wash asked. The android was learning things at an insane rate and had asked an endless list of questions. He still was.  
  
"I’m not impatient?" Tucker asked, the question confusing him.  
  
"You are tapping the steering wheel. Restlessness is an indicator of impatience. Or frustration." Wash paused to consider his statement. "Am I frustrating you, Tucker?"  
  
"No, no, you’re fine, Wash. Restlessness can indicate a bunch of different things. I guess I’m nervous about you meeting Junior." He stepped out of the car and slammed the door shut.  
  
Wash thought for a moment. “Should I also be ‘nervous’?”  
  
Tucker gave the android a smile before knocking on the font door. “Probably not. I’m sure you and Junior will get on fine.”  
  
"Hey, Tucker!" Donut said in his cheery voice. He looked to Washington with a grin. "And who might you be?"  
  
"My name is Washington, an artificial intelligence android that belongs to Tucker."  
  
Donut listened attentively. “You’re still pretty new, aren’t you Washington? Feel free to call me Donut.”  
  
"Yes, I am new,” he paused briefly. “Donut is an interesting name. Tucker calls me ‘Wash’."  
  
Donut laughed. “It’s actually my last name. Would it be okay if I called you Wash too?”  
  
Wash looked to Tucker who shrugged. “It’s your name, dude. You get to decide who can use it.”  
  
Wash deliberated for a moment. “Yes, you may.”  
  
Donut grinned. “Well, it’s great to meet you, Wash! Come on in, Doc is baking with Junior.”  
  
"You let him in the kitchen again?" Tucker asked as he entered the house.  
"It’s hard to keep him out. He loves the kitchen."  
  
"You mean he loves making a mess in the kitchen."  
  
"He’s only six. Hey, kiddo!” Donut shouted out. “Guess who’s here!"  
  
Tucker could hear something thud to the bench and the scraping of a wooden chair across tiles.  
Moments later Junior appeared in the doorway, his face covered in flour. Junior grinned widely, waving his arms madly for a moment before running into Tucker’s open arms. Two seconds later the little boy had released the quick hug and started signing wildly. It was obvious he was very excited and happy to see his dad.  
  
For the benefit of everyone in the house, Tucker laughed and quickly interrupted the boys signing before he’d gone too far into his story about his day.  
  
“Whoa, slow down there, kiddo. Not everyone can sign that quick.” He signed as he spoke, adding in a little extra detail explaining that Donut would get very confused.  
  
Junior looked sheepish and started over, signing much slower than before. As a native user of sign, Junior often forgot that most of the adults that he knew couldn’t keep up with him.  
Mid-way through his story about how he was playing tag with Donut before baking cakes with Doc, Junior realised that there was a new person to the group. He peered up at Wash curiously. He brought his small hand to his face and his expression grew confused. Resting his thumb just beneath his chin, crooked his finger a couple of times and then pointed at Wash for extra clarification.  
  
“This is Wash, he’s an android that will be staying with us.” Tucker said, signing along as he spoke.  
  
Junior looked confused. He made a fist with his left hand and then his right.  In a circular motion, he moved his right hand over his left, as though he were scrubbing something. Tucker shook his head. With his right hand, he touched three fingers to his shoulder before bringing his hand straight forward. “Short for Washington,” he said.  
  
Junior thought about it for a moment, signed ‘Washington’ to himself and nodded.  
  
“Hang on,” Donut said suddenly. “I thought you were getting the female model?”  
  
Tucker scratched the back of his head. “I accidentally ordered the wrong one and there’s a no returns policy for incorrect choices. But I’m not too upset. Wash seems like a pretty good unit.”  He glanced to Washington who was crouched down, peering at Junior whilst the youngster seemingly taught him the alphabet. “Thanks for looking after Junior for me today, guys.”  
  
“It’s not a problem!” Donut smiled.  
  
“We like having him around,” Doc added.  
  
“Okay, kiddo, ready to go?” Tucker asked.  
  
Junior nodded and turned to Tucker. With his right hand he spelled ‘Wash’ before spreading his fingers apart and bringing his thumb to rest on his chin.  
  
Tucker laughed as he picked up his son. He shook his head. It was a little awkward to sign whilst holding Junior. “Wash is a guy, but I guess if he doesn’t mind you can maybe one day call him Mom.”  
  
Junior shook his head, suddenly shy and signed that he’ll just call him ‘Wash’.  
  
Although Wash wasn’t a Mom, it might be nice having a big brother.


End file.
